Move 5 and a HALF stars
nikkei
Submitted this review about
Ori Van Lines Inc.
Review made Live: 1/17/2009 11:48:00 AM
Actually, I'm giving Got 2 Move 5 and a HALF stars.
WHY CAN'T I DO THAT?!
They are not "A." They are "A+."
Moving s**ks. Oh, sorry XXXyou already knew that. EVERYBODY KNOWS THAT. Here's my advice for how to make it s*ck less. DON'T...
...ask your friends to help you. They don't want to. They're just going to turn around and ask you someday, and you don't want to help them, either. NOBODY WANTS TO MOVE. NOT THEIR OWN SH*T, NOT YOUR SH*T. Face it.
...rent a truck. You'll give yourself a freakin' migraine driving all over town to pick it up AND ditch your car somewhere while collecting all your poor, guilt-tripped-into-helping-you friends at the same time, all too early on a Saturday. (And if your friends are like me and mine, they DON'T LIKE TO BE IN THE WORLD BEFORE NOON ON SATURDAY UNLESS THERE'S BOOZE INVOLVED. And booze + moving is sketchy...)
...drop more money on renting dollies and furniture pads and sh*t. You think it's gonna make your move easier, but you don't really know what the fxxx to do with these things. You're just burning up more money. YOUR MOVE IS STILL GOING TO S*CK. YOU ARE STILL GOING TO SWEAT. AND BE DIRTY AND EXHAUSTED. AND IN GENERAL, WANT TO END YOUR OWN LIFE.
...take all your poor guilt-tripped friends to the bar after to thank them. See above. This will BREAK YOUR BANK.
Do you see where I'm going with this? Because IF you do all the above, it's going to cost you a LOT of money anyway. And you are still going to go through a LOT of grief. Your move is STILL going to s*ck (have I said that already?). BIG TIME.
Instead, you should HIRE ORI VAN LINES !!!
That's how you make your move NOT s*ck. (Okay, s*ck less. You still have to pack. And unpack.)
They will be on time. Yes, movers can actually be on time. If they're ori van lines.
They will be fast.
They will handle your stuff with tender loving care.
They will be friendly and talk to you about soccer and your shared Eastern European heritage without sacrificing the above...
They will be affordable. Not really much more than what a s*cky do-it-yourself move would have cost you, either. Because you won't have to take them to the bar afterward and empty your checking account in thanks.
Actually, I WOULD have taken these dudes to the bar if they didn't have another move scheduled. They were that good, and that cool, and I was that grateful. And there was soccer on TV that day. So instead I gave them the biggest tip I've ever given any service people, for anything.
See, I AM a nice person! They brought it out in me.
A-FREAKIN'-PLUS!!!
